As dust settled out from the latest turbulence in Broadcasting House it was decided to hold another Press Conference. “I’m getting used to giving the briefings and not reporting on them” one journalist was heard to mutter.
After coughing loudly – both to clear the dust from his throat and also to draw the media focus upon himself – plumber Tim Davie smiled a bit pleasantly and explained:”Well, I was just called in to fix the Pepsi vending machines on the third floor, urgent like, and this guy comes up to me and he asks, like, do I like, like the telly and listen to Radio Four at all. Name’s Chris – nice guy, but a bit breathless, you know. Anyway, when I says “Yes” he says “OK, you’ll do. Can you start tomorrow?”
“Well, I said I was already working there, selling Pepsi, and he said that was great and he’d just transfer me over. I was to bill him directly- “anything reasonable”, he said.
“So, here I am. He told me the job’s called DeeGee and I’ve got to fire lots of people and then they’ll probably fire me but that’s OK because “He’ll see me alright”.
“Pretty cool, don’t you think. I can be just like Alan Sugar – chat with people for a few minutes, set them pointless tasks to do and then bring them back to my office and say “YOU’RE FIRED!”